Nathan and I are so enjoying our time away from normal routine. There is snow falling outside. We get to enjoy the company of good friends. The day is not dictated by our regular responsibilities. We are staying up late visiting, laughing and reminiscing. All of this is so wonderful and yet I am still so tired. It's a different kind of tired that I am accustomed. It is not 'mommy' tired. Being mom to four kids, or even just one for that matter, is so exhausting. I often say 'it is never ending.' It's true. Mom's shift does not stop. She is always on the clock. Vacation isn't vacation when Mom still has to take care of the kids. Mom is always thinking about children. The kids still need attention even when they are sleeping. The day is full of responsibilities and activities. There is always something to be done. The emotional investment in them is vast. It is constant and requires so much of you. Of course I never recognized this as a child living at home with my own mom and dad. I just demanded more and more from my mom.
I love being mom and I regret not being more thankful for my own over the years. It is a responsibility I take very seriously and that I enjoy more than I can express. I am so thankful that the Lord has enabled me to be a stay-at-home mom. Being able to fully invest all of the time and energy into the thing that God has called me to do is so rewarding. I wouldn't trade my around-the-clock, exhausting 'job' for anything. I get to see the growth, pretend football games, fears, silly moments, cute dances, sad eyes, jubilant screams, hurts, desires, disappointments, and fun times all from the front row seat that God has given me. Thank you Lord for giving me the desire of my heart to be mom to Toads, Girly Girl, Samoosa and String Bean.